Remembering Tongai ‘Dhewa’ Moyo

To Miniehle Mukweli, his surviving spouse, Tongai ‘Dhewa’ Moyo was intelligent, loving, humorous, always with a joke up his sleeve to lighten whatever dark mood. Had he lived to this day, Dhewa would have turned 45 on Tuesday last week.

He succumbed to Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, on Saturday 15 October 2011. Miniehle says although Dhewa’s birth certificate indicated that he was born in 1966, his actual birth year was 1968.

Interestingly, at the height of his career he waged a sungura war with Alick Macheso, who was two months older. The two always had a similar haircut and they are also believed to have shared a number of women.

But it is Miniehle who has most of the thoughts, most of the memories, wondering what could have been, if Dhewa had lived to today, for they shared the same birthday month. His birthday fell exactly six days after hers.

“I miss Tongai so much. He will always be in my heart. We had our problems like any other couple, but we would always find each other again. I have memories that are so difficult to erase,” she said.

She says the day he passed on was the worst day of her life.

“The last week of his life was quite confusing. The last Monday, he was well and smiling, the following day it got worse, the next day he was well and it went on and off like that the whole week. On the Friday when we left him he said he felt so much better, and even his swollen head had gone back to its normal size.”

But on Saturday as early as 6am she got a call from the hospital, for her to rush to the nursing facility.

“When we got there he was in so much pain. I had never seen him so low. He later passed on around 6pm and it was such a painful death. At times you want to think that his dying was better because he was in so much pain,” she said.

“Surely he is resting. He suffered so much that we would pray almost every minute asking the Lord to help him,” added Miniehle.

Dhewa’s widow, however, refused to comment on claims that she was spending time with other men while her husband was in hospital.

“I will not comment on rumours . . . Some said I was pregnant just after he died and one wonders why I still haven’t given birth yet.”

Miniehle says she was not moved by the negative media attention she got last year referring to Dhewa’s song “Takunda Miedzo” which she says he wrote for her.

“In fact, he sang that song for me when we got married because our situation was complicated. His wife (Barbra Muchengeti) had left him for the UK. He told me that they had a special connection and that she could come back any day which is why I did not move into the matrimonial home.

“When she came back I accepted my place as the second wife and only went to stay with them when he fell ill and wanted to reduce rental costs. We were such a happy family and he was a loving father who cared so much for his children.

“Most of the times before going on stage, wherever he would be, he would call and talk to each of his children, from Peter, Nyasha, Obert, Natasha, Nicole, Tanaka, even to his nephews who would be around. He would talk to everyone. He was such a loving family man.”

Her words were affirmed by Tongai’s daughter, Nyasha Brenda.

“There are no words to describe the void he left in our lives. Of course, his friends and relatives are always there for us, but it’s never the same. He cared for the family, he taught us to love one another always and respect every human being.”

Dhewa was not just a loving family man but a dear friend to many, a professional musician to promoters and a darling to many fans.

Childhood friend Pedro Phiri, who met Tongai when they were both Form Ones at Kwekwe High School, says he had gotten used to sharing his friend with thousands.

“We just clicked on the first day and we never lost each other. There were days I got jealous of him befriending other people, but, as time moved on, I realised that he was actually such an accommodative friend that is why he had so many friends. He was a friend to so many people even at school and many would just share their lunch with us.”

With him gone, Pedro says he is living a lonely life. He is not the only one. Kadoma businessman Cosmas Daka, aka Cossy Rules, believes there will never be any other musician in the mould of Dhewa.

“He dedicated a good chunk of time to his fans. He was so different from others, he was always there for the fans. He would often come to my shop and sit, just to meet people.”

Another friend, Leonard Manhanhanha, who runs an earth-moving equipment company, says he was moved by Tongai’s humility when they met that he offered to upgrade the road that led to the singer’s rural home in Sesombe, Zhombe.

“I had always imagined him as someone pompous, but when we met, I was shocked to discover he was totally the opposite. I greeted him from a distance and he stretched his hand in acknowledgment. In no time we struck a conversation and were soon exchanging numbers.

“When I got to know him deeper, I found that he listened and would let you talk. And when I asked him what I could do for him, he asked if I could upgrade the road that led to his rural area so that people could travel on it easier. I was pushed by his selflessness and did that. Unfortunately when he passed on I had not been able re-grade the road as I was facing financial challenges. ”

Show promoters Partson Chimbodza and Zacharia Five described Dhewa as a professional musician. “From the bottom of my heart, no man of Dhewa’s character will I ever find in this world. Life is just unfair. I wish I had total control over his life.

“The wound he left will take ages to heal. All I can do is dedicate my Nama award to Tongai Moyo for he meant a lot to me,” said Chimbodza.

For Five, Dhewa was a life-saver. “You could easily strike a deal with Tongai to get a show. He was so different from other musicians who you would need to bribe to get a show,” said Five.

“I remember at one time I hired him for US$5 000 for three shows. The first two shows flopped dismally so after the last one he called me to his hotel room and asked me why I thought attendance had been that poor.

“I explained to him that the printing of posters had delayed so we could not put them up in good time. He then gave me back my money and collected the gate-takings for the next show. I was amazed because many of these other musicians would never do that,” he said.