By Wilbert Mukori
When President Robert Mugabe rigged the July 2013 elections he thought it was going to be business as usual for him and his cronies. They would pick up where they left off in 2008 when they were forced to form the “two headed monster called the GNU”, as Mugabe called it.
It would have been business as usual if Zanu PF could rig economic recovery – real economic recovery meant addressing the causes of the economic meltdown like corruption which Mugabe had ignored over the years; it would not be business as usual if he did.
Mugabe had a plan for rigging economic recovery – the $27 billion ZimAsset. Sadly for him the West was not fooled and they refused to contribute a penny to ZimAsset. Not even the Chinese would contribute even one Yuan for him to rattle the begging bowl with.
After a year of staring at the mocking empty ZimAsset begging bowl and a fast collapsing economy, the regime does not have enough money to pay civil servant let alone anything else, Mugabe come to his senses. He has admitted he cannot rig economic recovery and accepts there is need to talk.
It is surprising was Tsvangirai’s reaction to call for talks; he was ecstatic! “I notice the emerging consensus on my call for dialogue. The same call has been made by international institutions, Cabinet ministers, economists and civic society,” said Tsvangirai. He is very excitable and gets easily carried away!
If it was left to Zanu PF alone, they would have Tsvangirai and some of those wishy-washy civic groups to the talks precisely because Mugabe knows he will run rings round the idiots just as he has done in the past! But Mugabe must know that adding a totally discredited Tsvangirai to his equally discredited regime will not fool SADC, much less those with the money to finance the economic recovery.
Most international donors, including the mediocre UN, abandon MDC when they saw the rubbish Copac constitution they had help fund to the tune $100 million. When the GNU begged for more money to pay for the stakeholders’ meetings, the referendum on the Copac constitution and for holding the elections themselves, none of the donors paid a penny.
SADC and the AU and the last of the international community who still supported MDC finally deserted the party in dismay after they warned the party not take part in the July 2013 elections without reforms and they were ignored! It is clear to see why Tsvangirai is drumming his chest like a silverback mountain gorilla; he is a man of little intellect and is easily fooled. Mugabe has only to give him a ministerial car and he will be over the moon; the tyrant will tell him jump and Tsvangirai will be asking how high.
Does Tsvangirai have the $ 27 billion to bankroll the ZimAsset plan? No he does not. He does not have a penny. He and his usual kitchen cabinet would be looking to be added to the civil servant wage bill. If Mugabe thinks bringing Tsvangirai through the back door to spruce up his Zanu PF image will fool anyone then he has a lot to learn. Not even SADC, much less the more savvy international community with the money, will be fooled.
A Zimbabwe stakeholders’ meeting of the same half-wits who attended the Copac Constitution Stakeholders’ Meeting in 2012 will fool no one. The only meeting worth attending is one that will deliver free, fair and credible elections at the end of the day. It is really naive for anyone to think that Mugabe and Zanu PF can be trust to host such a meeting!
As for our silver-back mountain gorilla, let him drum his chest; he will never ever be king of the mountain. We all make mistakes but the blunders he has made, especial his failure to get even one reform implemented, proved beyond all doubt that Tsvangirai is an idiot! Zimbabweans made a big mistake in having voted Tsvangirai into high office over the years; people did not know he was incompetent. It would be sheer folly for the nation to once again entrust its destiny into the hands of an idiot, knowing he is an idiot. As for the international community they know better than to treat Tsvangirai any other way than as the village idiot he is.
Soon after he was sworn in as Prime Minister in 2009, Tsvangirai visited all the capitals of leading Western countries asking them to fund Zimbabwe’s economic recovery. He told the world that Mugabe had “changed”. Of course that was not true, the tyrant had his thugs beating up white farmers and corruption was going on as before. No one in the West was fooled and they sent Tsvangirai back empty handed.
Mugabe can try to fudge political reform by calling discredited stakeholders like Tsvangirai just as he has tried to rig economic recovery but he will fool no one. Tsvangirai can have another tour of the West but he will return to Zimbabwe, once again, empty handed!
So Mugabe has a simple choice – either hold serious talk with serious participants and move the country forward or hold meaningless talk with discredited individuals like Tsvangirai and stare at the mocking ZimAsset begging bowl for a bit longer. Whatever he decides, he will have to hold serious talks sooner or later, there is no other way out!