Tomana Uya Womama? Don’t celebrate yet

By Mukomana We Kuseri

Life, kuno kuseri, can be taff mhani I tell you. You wake up in the morning knowing kuti landlord will want rent, at any date, any time, it could be today, because something has come up and he needs the money now.

He knows kuti you are not working. Apa madam is starting to hint that it will soon be 14 February, as if that is meant to mean anything? What is the relevance of a date when the suffering continues?

But sometimes, things happen that just make you smile, even munhamo imomo. Smile a bit, then start doubting. Like the news that Tomana, tormentor of Beatrice Mtetwa, defender of Kereke and rape apologist extraordinaire, had been given a taste of his own medicine.

Life.

The constitution that I have been consulting recently from Madzibaba Google, says that he is not answerable to anyone! Who writes things like that veduwee, kuti munhu anoita madiro aJojina munyika ino. He is not answerable to anyone! Why is this possible in a democracy, that someone can be answerable to no one? Am I the one person that is angry about this?

That got into his head, no doubt. So he runs around defending Kereke from facing the music for inflicting his fat tub on an innocent little child. Even after the courts ordered him to get that certificate out, he tried to refuse, because, as you know, he is not answerable to anyone.

And he chases after that woman from Swaziland or other place who makes Zimbabwe proud of her with her fearless fight for law and order and human rights, him acting like munhu akamborambwa or something. How do you run an office on the sole agenda of persecuting one woman?

Then, as if defending Kereke was not enough, he decided that he would go and give advance immunity to other rapists. Remember? That time when he said that sex with girls under 16 is not always rape? Who talks like that honestly? And that it was okay to sentence rapists to community service because once they raped someone, they were no longer a danger to anyone else?

Did the constitutional court that we are now hearing a lot of recently not say that girls should not be married unless they are 18? Talk about flying in the face of public and legal opinion. Sex with children under 16 is okay if they agree, in a country where the courts and the people are suggesting 18 is the right number.

You are the Prosecutor General of a whole country, not just a burial society or something like that, a whole country, and you run around defending rapists from prosecution, suggesting that paedophiles must get away with it because their 16 year old victims will have asked for it, and if they are caught, we must send them to do community service in schools!

And all the while persecuting lawyers for defending the law. Surely, who would I like as the neighbour or living in the main house right now: Beatrice Mtetwa of this Kereke fellow? But Tomama was after which one again? And we are not angered by this?

So, when the chickens seemingly come home to roost, we must be glad. Glad that he interfered with Dr Amai’s perfect concoction of lies: honestly Zimbabweans, come on! Wake up! Are we to believe that anyone seriously wanted to firebomb Dr Amai’s stolen dairy?

That they would go to this place in the dark of night, no electricity in sight, but still carry their party manifestos and constitutions with them? For what purpose? To go and do what? Was this a suicide mission, so that we would know who had done the deed?

And who has ever heard of this political party?

Can you not see that they are trying to justify a political emergency? That if there are political parties planning terrorist acts then the President can be justified in abrogating some of the constitutional protections? Why are we not angry at these blatant attempts to subvert our democracy?

What I do not get is: why did Tomana then frustrate these plans? Was he not clued in on the plan? Or did he realise that the story would never stick until they decided to create fake witnesses out of some of the accused? After all, is he not their man?

We will never know. What we do know is that it looks like Tomana is in hot yoghurt right now, and having thwarted Dr Stop-it, one wonders who will be bold enough to save him.

Unless if the whole thing is a ruse. A long con to try kutivhara kumeso so that it looks like no one is above the law.

Question: how is it that he gets arrested and is taken to court on the same day without tasting life in the cells at CID? When that Pastor with no congregation, Patrick Mugadza went round with a placard he got charged $500.00 bail without a salary to his name.

Yet this man, who is answerable to no-one, and who gets paid out of the Consolidated Revenue Fund according to the constitution I found on Madzibaba Google, gets just $1,000.00 bail? Where is the justice in that?

Mugadza spent more than three weeks in jail because he could not afford the bail, having spent a few days in the cells waiting to be taken to court. Tomana gets to avoid Makedenge’s CID cells, gets to avoid the urine smelling and lice infested cells at Harare Remand, and walks into court the day he is arrested and is out on a bail that is a fraction of his monthly salary. One that he pays with change from his pocket?

So one law for them, and one for us? Why am I the only one who seems to be angered by this?

Mukomana We Kuseri