‘I say NO to booty pictures’

By Dr Annah Bengesai

Allow me to vent…

I know some people will be flustered by what I have to say, but I am going to say it anyway. There is this fad where girls and women take ‘reverse’ pictures- yes, I mean pictures of their booty and post them on social networks.

Even babes as young as 12/13 years old have caught up with the craze. And then, there is the skin exposure, you really wonder whether one is a stripper. Gone are the days when being elegant meant being graceful.

It seems my kind has become so ‘assified’ there is a tsunami of belfies (selfies of the booty) everywhere. The obsession is ridiculously insane some women are opting for butt-hip enhancements, and squat challenges just to get that head turning booty.

Welcome to the era of the ‘booty’- whence and whither grace and dignity.

Now my sister, you might think my venting is permeated with jealousy. But trust me; I am naturally endowed, not only with curves, but also a big and fine ole donk. Granted, when I look at myself in the mirror I like what I see, but I never let that define me or my worth as a woman. I am much more than my body and so are you, dear sister.

My little sisters, some not so little, it saddens me that you have ‘objectified’ yourself and reduced your worth to a ‘thing’ of pleasure for the opposite sex. Why do you disgrace yourself- just to get likes on social media? Has Facebook, Instagram etc blurred the lines between that which is private and public, such that what should be enjoyed by that one special person is now shared publicly?

I know some of you are married, and you are probably asking ‘who am I to tell you about dress or your booty?’ After all, your husband or boyfriend enjoys it, and, is probably the first one to like your provocative pictures. But we all know we protect and guard jealously that which we cherish. So yes, your ass is for him to enjoy, and not for the world to gaze. If he is willing to share ‘your ass’ with the other brothers out there, even if it’s just for a like or a comment, you need to start asking yourself how much he values you.

I might be coming across as too strong, please forgive me. I am torn between being the loving sister who understands that something has seriously gone wrong and you my sister, are entrapped, and making you understand your condition.

I am aware that if you fully understood the significance of your actions, you would probably think twice about those provocative pictures. I also know that you have been miseducated into thinking that the more likes you get for your butt, the more significant you become. I believe you can do better, my dear sister. Your worth is not in your behind.

Have you forgotten dear sister that we have fought hard to be validated, not for our looks or culinary skills, but for our intellect as well? I am actually surprised self-proclaimed feminists are quiet about this trend, which annihilates that which they stand for.

With each ‘reverse’ or semi naked picture you post, you are validating the belief that women are sexual objects and a trophy in a man’s arms and mmm…. bed. Just think of the brother who soiled his pants during the lap dance with the pole dancer, Bev Sibanda.

Little sister, please understand that by posting your pictures on social media, you are branding yourself, whether you are aware of it or not. With each picture you post, you are defining your image to the world.

Dress the way you want to be addressed. You are what you tweet or post. Yes, perception is everything. Are you now surprised that some prowlers start inboxing you, leave their numbers and let the whole world know how much they wanna get down with you?

Maybe someone is probably thinking, ‘I have a fine body, and it must be celebrated’. Granted, it’s your right. But don’t be fooled, no-one will take you seriously simply because you have a fine ass. Maybe momentarily, you might get the attention that you ‘deserve’, but never as a respectable and exemplary woman. Remember, you are free to make a choice- but you are not free from the consequences of that choice.

Wouldn’t it be awesome my dear sister to be celebrated for your intellect, grace and dignity, than something that doesn’t last forever. And if you are endowed with both beauty and brains, you certainly can rule the world. My ‘ass’ enthusiast sister, have some discernment on how you portray yourself. Unless you are the kind whose ass pays the bills, you have more to offer beyond that ass.

Little sisters and some not so little, I am not in any way advocating for women to wear mourning or unflattering clothes. By all means there is nothing wrong with being sexy and feminine. But there is a limit between what should be private and public.

My sister, there is power in mystique. Just ask the brothers. Some things should be left to the imagination and ‘them other brothers’ should be blessing your man, not because they have seen ‘it’, but because they know ‘it’ has exclusive rights.

I don’t know about you, but I say NO to booty pictures!!

I say NO to exploitation. I am a woman, intelligent, beautiful, feminine and a BIG FAT NO- not an object of pleasure. I respect myself enough to keep my goodies in my bag! Do you?

The author Dr Annah Bengesai can be reached on email: [email protected]